As I’ve approached my self-imposed deadline for this blog entry, I’ve had a very difficult time coming up with anything at all to say. I had toyed with the concept of writing a follow up to the entry that I wrote about nothing a while back. Because, I really felt that I had nothing to say, but I don’t know if that’s really true.
I use this space to unpack my baggage. I use this space as my outlet to discuss various things, usually relating to my own mental health. And I’ve said many times that when I’m in a good place mentally, I don’t have much to say here. And that’s where I am now.
While there isn’t much going on with me personally, there’s so much going on in the world around me. There’s been so much within the first month of 2021. The various stuff in Washington, DC. There’s been the storming of the Capitol, to the swearing in of Joe Biden as the 46th President of the United States. There’s the ongoing Pandemic. There’s all of the stuff going on with the stock market. There’s just so much happening in the world, even as the world has slowed down with the Pandemic.
I often see people talking about the younger generations being “soft.” People say that too much offends the younger people. They say that they’re not “manly enough” and other garbage like that. I’m not going to get into that here, but that topic, and some personal stories of my own about being bullied have given me stuff to think about and I’ll probably be writing something about that in the near future.
A few weeks ago, I was discussing my old blog entries on MySpace. Maybe I didn’t take them as seriously as I do the entries here, but I threw in “Easter eggs” in all of those entries. I had fun writing them and inserting various reoccurring themes into them just to see if anyone would notice. Granted, the majority of the things that I referenced were for my own amusement, but isn’t that the fun of it?
Another topic that I will likely get into more detail about soon is how I’m surviving without concerts. I’ve mentioned on numerous occasions that going to concerts is like therapy for me. Different bands mean different things to me. How I experience, feel, and take in one band is completely different than another. It’s been almost a full year since I’ve been to a live show. How has that impacted me? Something that I’ve relied on so much in life hasn’t been an option for me. This topic will be explored soon.
I’ve started to realize that this entry is turning into a behind the scenes concept for this blog. I’ve discussed how I used to write entries and things that I may write in the future.
I think I may write about teachers that were positive influences on me. There’s definitely a few that did things to encourage me. In most cases, I didn’t realize it at the time. But, I think that what they did was subtle enough and when I did realize what they did for me, in most cases, many years later, I really did appreciate it. Yeah, that’ll probably be a topic here.
At the risk of sounding more pessimistic than I’ve been here recently, I don’t see the current situation with the Pandemic changing that much in the near future. That means that what I’ve been doing for most of the past year is going to continue, and it could mean that my lack of current things to talk about will also continue. I guess you could say that it’s a good thing (for me). Because, if I don’t have anything new to talk about here, that means, in theory, that I’m doing well. But, regardless of that, I want this forum to challenge me. I don’t want the challenge to be just having an entry once per month, I want the challenge to be writing something good once per month.
As I’ve been working on this entry, ideas have come to me for future entries. I’m going to do my best to plan some and put some effort into them. This one has been a total spontaneous one, after a few drafts were started, and will likely never be published. Maybe I’ll even get some of them out before each month ends. That may be too much to ask, but you never know.
This entry actually does remind me of my old MySpace entries. There’s no cohesive theme in it. And while those entries are no longer available online, I do have them all saved. I may look at them. It’s interesting to see what I wrote about before and to see how much I expressed. Will I see anger? Will I see sadness? Will I see total joy? Probably not the joy. As for the Easter Eggs in those entries, I’ll be amused by them still, since I know the jokes. Don’t look for an Easter Egg in this entry. Even if I did put one here, you wouldn’t know it yet.
So now that I’ve torn down the fourth wall in a non-TV setting, I’m going to wrap this up. I’m impressed that I was able to drag this out as long as I was. I’ll be back here soon enough. I’ll probably discuss one of the topics that I talked about earlier. And since I’m (sort of) committing to one of them now, I’ll actually put some time and effort into it.